Is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and aren't around anymore?
nope.

What if they were back in your life?
-

Are you keeping a big secret right now?
no, i'm extremely open.

Besides sleeping, what else do you do in your room?
listen to music, dance (hahaha), watch tv, play wii, my room is amazing.

Do you have a gay friend?
nah, i want one! hah.

Do you like Canada?
never been there.

Who do you live with?
mom, dad and sis.

Are your parents protective of you?
yes.

What actions do you do when you're really nervous?
studder, become silent, play with my phone.

Is money important to you?
it's not my life but lately it's a priority. i put myself in a big hole by spending too much, and i need money for my car and other things.

How much time per day do you have to relax and be alone?
as much as i need. i'm not on any kind of schedule.

Do you prefer to be around people, or by yourself?
around people. i guess you could say i have a fear of being alone.

Do you think you'll get along better with your siblings when you get older?
i hope so. she's a total bitch to me.

Does internet gossip ever end in you sitting in tears at the computer desk?
no.

Do you find yourself happy at this point?
yeah. i don't wanna spill my guts in a survey, but i've totally changed myself for the better.

What did you last cry over?
argument with my family. dad, mom, kristy and grandmom would not speak to me on christmas eve and branded me with fucking up christmas.

Where were you two nights ago?
sonic with my friendzz.

What is today's date?
1/25/09

Who do you text the most?
alyssa long :]

How do you make your money?
mcdonalds and dairy queen. and driving my sister places/running errands for my parents.

What is your favorite color?
green.

What color are your eyes?
brown.

Where is the furthest place you've traveled?
florida. haha i wanna go to places damn it.

Do you look more like your mom or your dad?
i dont think either. me and kristy look so alike, but we're siblings.

How long does it take you to shower?
20 minutes.

Do you like funny people or serious people?
funny people, because i'm a jokester.

What are some lyrics to the song you're listening to?
"i never wanna see your face around here, anymore, because it's a breakdown, and where do we go from here?"
breakdown- forever the sickest kids!

What jewelry do you wear ALL the time?
necklace, i change the charm daily, i lost my FTSK bracelet, and usually my black and white bracelet.

What do you have planned for tonight?
it's 8. i'm tired and i think rock of love bus is on tonight, so the answer is no.

Do you have a favorite item of clothing?
i love hoodies in general and i have an unhealthy amount. 30 is pretty bad.

If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
to fix things i guess. not that they need fixing, it's just. i can't explain anything haha.

Who makes you happiest right now?
my friends.

What were you doing at midnight last night?
sleeping. i'm a bum haha.

Do you want to get married & have children?
yes.

Whats the first thing you did after you left your house today?
went out to eat with kristy, then we got my car washed. sucks it's gonna snow now.

How much money did you spend yesterday?
$25 or so.

A million dollars, or true happiness forever?
happiness. hello.

Your parents tell you they're moving to Mexico?
have fun. hahaha.

If you could change your eye color would you?
nope.

What are you doing this weekend?
well it's sunday so it's like over already. but tuesday night we're planning a sleepover since there's no school wednesday. oh and we're making videos.

Who did you last get into an argument with?
my dad. world's most retarded argument ever.

Is it easy to annoy you?
ehh.

Have you ever had a really big fight with a best friend?
yup.

Have you ever given a random person your number?
hahaha not yet.

Night light or pitch-black?
night light.

Have you ever wanted to bottle up a moment and save it forever?
sure. that's weird though.

If you had a choice to work or not, would you work?
i would work. i'm kind of a workaholic when it comes down to it. i have to keep busy.

Ever truly wanted to kill someone?
no.

Is there one person who can make you feel better no matter what?
yes.

What is on your bed right now?
i am, a tennent blanket, remote to my ihome, my laptop

When was the last time you threw up?
forever ago. yuck.

Is anything bugging you right now?
yup, my family. they don't do it on purpose, but like honestly i'm so sick of coming home and everyone's asleep and the house is a mess. then i get yelled at for not cleaning, or trying to have a life. my curfew was never 10 o clock on the weekend, what's up with that? and my mom, she's the biggest annoyance right now. i love her to death, but some of the things she does and says to me lately just makes me so pissed off. i know she's sick, i know it needs time, but come on, you're pulling me down with you. you're telling me my dad who is retired and does NOTHING cannot clean the house, and all you can do is SLEEP? yeah sorry about that rant.

Who is the last person you missed a call from?
Lia.

Have you changed this year?
yes.

Whats your favorite thing to eat?
caesar salad from panera bread :D

Where was your default picture taken?
idk some random street?

you know what's funny?

the way i'm always trying to save the world.


"i can't explain a thing, i want everything to change and stay the same."

i know what i want, i'm finally making an effort to get it.

i honestly dont know what im talking about right now.

How many times have you hit the backspace button? Put the television on mute, or turned down the radio?

Take that feeling and experience it.

Bingo, we have a winner.

i keep forgetting these things exsist. i kinda love it when i pull up something i haven't written in a while and just go back to see what i wrote. bittersweet sometimes.

there's nothing really to say. i guess i just wanted to save today's date in this thing.

How's life been going?

Well, it's currently 1:45 am, I'm listening to the song Apologize and feeling like my guts are gonna come up through my mouth any second now. I feel so sick to my stomache at this moment.

Life's been great otherwise. I got my permit, I've been driving. Hell, I drove on a street with traffic for the first time, before I was doing circles in an empty parking lot.

I got everything I wanted for Christmas and a little more. I'm getting along better with people and I'm not letting anything get to me. It's late and I'm releasing thoughts, it feels kinda good to just write sometimes, you know?

I need to get my grades up, but I knew that already.

I've got a new focus, it finally isn't on you.

one month til sweet 16.
my party's gonna be october 20th. mark it down.

i don't really know what to write. but i feel like i haven't posted in forever. i'm going down to philly to spend the weekend with family. i kind of need that right now. i don't feel like writing out what went through my mind the last few days. but i'm coming out of it.

spiderdom. haha must i say more?


Here's to the kids who spend their nights with their window open wishing the kid they loved wasn't such a wallflower and playing 'A Little Less Sixteen Candles' loud enough to be heard on the street. - Pete Wentz

I just bought an acoustic guitar tonight. I'm so physced to be playing again. Music honestly has become my favorite thing in the past few years and learning the acoustic again is gonna be amazing.

Today was kind of a lazy day. I slept til 1, then had chores to do and then my mom came home. We went to Target to get my acoustic and I got a few books and picks and anything else I'd need for it. Then we got cheesesteaks for dinner.

Right now I'm working on learning Fall Out Boy's "Sophmore Slump or Comeback Of The Year" and the next one I wanna learn is Blink 182's "What's My Age Again". I kinda got my work cut out, eh?

Everytime I put the guitar down, I pick it back up, it's so damn addicting, you can bet I'm gonna put all my spare time into this.

My dad comes home tomorrow from his business trip. He'll be home about the same time I'm coming home from school. I can't wait to see him.

And My mom said she's gonna take me to California... in 2 years. Her friend is moving out there in two years and she wants to go visit him so we're gonna go together cause I've been begging to go to Cali.

Anyway, back to my acoustic. =]

I've decided this is gonna be my new journal place. Xanga kinda just died and got really boring to me somehow.

Anyway: What's New:

My dad agreed to be the commissioner of my basketball league. This is gonna be pwnage, cause I can help him with the evaluation drills and I have a say in what goes on and such, plus it means I'm gonna be in on everything. My dad's also still away on business. I miss him.

School is boring. The end. No argument needed.

Hmm, what else? I'm thinking about buying an acoustic guitar. I wanna learn how to play, but I may end up asking my gmom to buy me one for my birthday. My party so far is gonna consist of all my friends hanging at my house, we're gonna have a bondfire in the backyard (I was thinking if I can play, play the acoustic too) and play wii. My parents said they're gonna get pizza and ice cream and I have guitar hero too, so I don't know, it's really still in the works.

I have NO time to myself anymore. Okay, this is my schedule. Mon- Fri, get up at 6 am to straighten my hair and get ready for school, leave for school by 7. Walk home and or get a ride home after school, then homework and chores and maybe even work. Saturday and Sunday? Wake up at 6 am and be at work before 7 am and then work til 3. Plus like I said basketball is coming up and when I'm not doing anythign I'm usually dead tired. Rawr.

i became an xanga whore again. psh. sometimes i get tired of posting there, so here i am.

so. life's been good to me. i can't lie. things are amazing. and i love it. tomorrow i'm hanging out with 2.0 and maybe Dom? If he ever decides to answer his damn phone. Work was boring today. Like nobody was in. Haha, i think they all think my parents are divorced? I'd explain but i'm too lazy to right now.

I'm currently listening to Boys Like Girls. Rawr, is it Sunday yet? my mom promised I get the sidekick monday.

I'm so proud of myself. No texting for two straight weeks.

haha Dom, you loose. I win.

he tried to steal my phone and i almost kicked his ass. he said i needed texting rehab. well, i went two weeks without it, so how's that for ya?

rawrz. i'm all hyper/fiesty ish?

FIRST DAY OFF THIS WEEK TOMORROW. woo.
family wedding saturday. um?
rawr @ dressing up.

i need a boy to entertain me.

=|

wtf face at myself.

but seriously.

so hence, this is my new/old journal.
yeah.

so today was intresting. it was kristy's birthday. so my family came up and i actualy had fun.

last night was more fun. amanda 2.0 came over and we went swimming at like 8 at night. it was funny and awesome. then it started lightning so we had to get out.

i've been swimming like everyday, which proves i'm over my emo stage of not being outside.

summer league bball starts next week. i'm so physced.

vacation weekend: Shore from Saturday Night to Tuesday morning. Amanda 2.0 is coming. it's gonna be awesome and amazing.

I'm off to write. Inspiration comes in the weirdest ways, no?

my parents pissed me off. so i'm venting through writing. amanda 2.0 and i had a discussion on emo-ness and break downs. it was intresting. haha.

yesterday i tried to break a record by listening to every fall out boy song on my ipod 5 times, needless to say i ran out of daylight before i could complete the task. (I got home around 4) haha.

i want a video ipod really badly. I'm only $84 from a refurbished one. woot woot =]

I just had all my livejournals from the past sent to my email. & i read every one of them. It's amazing how time just flies by and things change so much. & it sucks.

my day was pretty okay. i had a basketball game tonite.
we won by 12 points. conviently, i had 12 points in the game.
therefore, i gave us the lead.
final score: 22-12
purple rules. i guess.

i'm not sure about much anymore. what people think about me. what the hell im doing. how i function. it seems like everyday i just roll out of bed and deal. and then roll back into bed at nite. i used to have sleeping problems but now i can sleep. & i find myself dreaming about the same things. the same people.
and it makes me wonder.

i'm out.